First of all in souls-like a player lv 100 is always stronger than a lv1 even if you put points in stats you dont use, because defense is increased by the general level.
So a player lv100 with 99 points in luck still has muuuuch greater defence than a lv1.
Other thjng, even in games like elden ring a lot of players lamented dying too fast as they didnt want to level vigor/hp. The average player is dumb, they prefer to increase damage by 5% compared to increasing hp by 20%. It’s seen in a lot of action rpg series, like monster hunter too, where 90% of players use only hyper offensive skills to increase damage by nearly nothing while taking a lot of damage.
That doesnt mean the system doesnt work, you just have to take player’s dumbness in consideration and balance it accordingly.
The real problem of nrftw’s lv system is that the difference between stats is only the list of weapons rhey can use, so it doesnt really feel like a game defining choice. In souls each stat has an added effect apart from the scaling of weapons/magic, so that a pure intelligence playstyle is completely different from a pure strength or dex …
Last thing, you’re changing too many things by being scared of players not liking or not understanding things, you have to commit to design choices and continue developing them, not change ideas all the time.
You want a challenging isometric souls-like with diablo-like loot? Do it. The majority of players will lament the challenge (they do it in from’s games too, all the time) and the loot. Have you seen all other arpgs like diablo and poe? If you make them not spammy people will cry because they cant dodge and learn movesets. Commit to your choices, not everything has to be for everyone.
Or at least add an hard mode for those that like challenging games, as that was the game you advertized.
Great games are made by creating what you love, not by making what the mass thinks they want. A game for everyone is a game for no one.